From the Right...
Come and listen to my story 'bout a man named Gore
A snippy Democrat, who was really quite a bore
On election day of his Presidential bout
He thought he lost the fight but he got to recount
Ballots that is ... punch cards...butterflies
Well, the next thing you know they're countin' 'em
again
He lost a second time so he gave it all some spin
They said Palm Beach is the place you oughta be
So he hired legal experts from Tallahassee
Florida that is... Sunshine State...deadlocked
Well the next thing you know they wanna change the
rules
And play around with votes cause they think we're
stupid fools
They riled lotsa folks and they made a lotta fuss
Till Cheney came along and started kickin' butts
Buttocks that is...liberal hineys... left-wing tuchas
Al Gore whined that the system wasn't fair
After countin' ballot holes that weren't even there
Kate Harris said the recount was a joke
But that didn't stop the liberals from tallyin votes
Democrat votes that is... hangin' Chad...dimpled
ballots
Well, the State Supreme Court gave Gore another break
They let him count again cause the party was at stake
But just when he thought that his dream was born anew
The overseas votes gave it all to W.
George W that is... Texas Governor...President-elect
Now it's time to say good-bye to Al and all his kin
He tried to steal some votes but it didn't help him
win
You're all invited over to his house in Tennessee
To sit around and blubber at his pity-party
Nashville that is...pout a while...have some sour
grapes
Ya'll have fun now... Ya Hear?
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...and from the Left
Come and listen to my story 'bout a boy name Bush.
His IQ was zero and his head was up his tush.
He drank like a fish while he drove all about.
But that didn't matter 'cuz his daddy bailed him out.
DUI, that is. Criminal record. Cover-up.
Well, the first thing you know little Georgie goes to Yale.
He can't spell his name but they never let him fail.
He spends all his time hangin' out with student folk.
And that's when he learns how to snort a line of coke.
Blow, that is. White gold. Nose candy.
The next thing you know there's a war in Vietnam.
Kin folks say, "George, stay at home with Mom."
Let the common people get maimed and scarred.
We'll buy you a spot in the Texas Air Guard.
Cushy, that is. Country clubs. Nose candy.
Twenty years later George gets a little bored.
He trades in the booze, says that Jesus is his Lord.
He said, "Now the White House is the place I wanna be."
So he called his daddy's friends and they called the GOP.
Gun owners, that is. Falwell. Jesse Helms.
Come November 7, the election ran late.
Kin folks said "Jeb, give the boy your state!"
"Don't let those colored folks get into the polls."
So they put up barricades so they couldn't punch their holes.
Chads, that is. Duval County. Miami-Dade.
Before the votes were counted five Supremes stepped in.
Told all the voters "Hey, we want George to win."
"Stop counting votes!" was their solemn invocation.
And that's how George finally got his coronation.
Rigged, that is. Illegitimate. No moral authority.
Y'all better pray now. Ya hear?
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