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Watch It, ESPN! (caution, spoiler below)

Watch ESPN is an incredible app. I can watch a game now or I can watch it later (later, in this case). I can watch a game on my TV (via HDMI from my computer, in this case), my computer, my tablet, or my smartphone. Watch ESPN is also incredibly inconsiderate of its customers. Watch it, ESPN! It will surprise no one who knows me that I'm no fan of spoilers. For all its incredibleness, Watch ESPN is a minefield of spoilers. Sure, not on the surface. But if you're a connoisseur (and mortal enemy) of the spoiler as I am, you'll find them no matter how you try to avoid them. 6pm Mountain Time, four hours after kickoff, I've successfully avoided email, text, and social media. I start with http://espn.go.com/watchespn/. So far, so good. I select the last option, unable to help but note the 3pm ET broadcast start for the 4pm ET kickoff. I'll return to the matter of the resulting "splash screen" in just a bit. Here's the actual stream just prior to the opening kickoff. Let's take a closer look at some of Watch ESPN's "helfpul" features. First, there's the clock (from later in the game). Almost 4 hours. We know that the first hour was preview. Full time would add another 2 for a total of 3. What to make of the final hour, then? Clearly, additional time and likely penalty kicks. That's a HUGE spoiler. It means that late in regular time with the score tied, no one will be putting one in. That's more than I want to know, because EVERYTHING is more than I want to know. (I don't even want to know that it was a great game ... or a boring game ... because those are both spoilers.) Feature number two? The "big play" markers that span the timeline. Big plays are represented by small colored triangles just below the main image (see the opening kickoff screen shot above). And that's more bad news for the spoilerphobe. If there's not triangle in the immediate future, there's no score. Spoiler. What's worse, the triangles are color-coded--in this case, blue for Argentina, orange for Netherlands. So we don't just know when the next big will be, we know who'll be making it. If there was any doubt about how the game would end, take a closer look at the triangles at lower right. Yeah, penalties. Still, the biggest suspense of all remained--who would advance? Well, remember the splash screen I mentioned? Scroll down a bit for the view immediately after selecting the program I wanted and before the streaming began. Hmm, who might have moved on? Watch it, ESPN!